Entries for June, 2005
June 1st, 2005
Ba’t Ang Tanga ko? POSTED AT 10:51 PM WEDNESDAY – Enrollment ng CFAD sa Uste. Ang ganda na ng porma ko pero walang kwenta rin pala kasi dapat naka Uniform pala! Halos lahat naka Uniporme. Ang mga posibleng rason: Pride (kampante ako na alam ko kung san yung bahay yumpala sablay, di ko alam.) Makalimutin (ang dakilang A.D.D. *bow* ) at Tanga (kasi di na yata ako nag-iisip) Haaay. Balak ko pa naman mag DL tapos nangyayari to sakin. Hindi ko alam kung ba’t bigla ‘to nangyari sa’kin pero I’ll just do my best not to let these things happen again. Hehe yun lang! Hmhmhmhmhmhmhm… P.S. Have you ever felt low towards yourself? Have you ever felt guilty that you were the cause of every bad thing that’s happening? Did you ever try staring blankly in one spot with all the loneliness shrouding the mind? I guess I’m not the only one having these round-up emotions. Sigh* Currently listening to: The Used - Take It Away Currently feeling: unfair 3 ang sumagot...SA
|
|
June 2nd, 2005
I wasn't meant to shove him away. POSTED AT 03:44 PM And as I rummaged through my other stuff, opening old notebooks, there I saw text messages I receieved, thus I wrote it down at that time. The thing is, I can't remember writing those in the notebook I was reading. But then I laughed so hard coz they were text messages from "him". HAHAHAHAHA ! I thought I tore all the written text replies. (Yikes freaky, I wrote text messages. How icky is that! Eew!) Really... But the funny thing was that I was feeling down again about him, doubting, worrying, and here goes the notebook with all those about him. And here I was reminiscing through good 'ol times with him just through text. Time sure flies. That was October last year. Really, that incident wasn't the 1st time. It ocurred to me everytime I'd feel problematic towards him. Hahahahaha ! And THAT's the reason why I laughed. Eerie... "Kung kelan talaga oo..." I commented.. That's why I hate fixing things at times. Coz I get to pick up even the smallest memory through bits and pieces of old shattered stuffies. But it's truly rewarding. You get to rewind the happy moments, then when you realize you're in so-called "Now or Today" you start to realize "If only..." BlaBlaBla... All sorts of thoughts come again. And... Well ! Hahahaha. But to tell you the truth, I really miss that particular occasion where we were texting and he was open, he was sharing stuff and he was just this friend that I had whom I enjoyed having. Hahaha! Yey. And now, yeah we're still friends. Last night I felt a lil bit unfair again coz of my selfishness. I should've NOT asked what his problem was. Here I was acting all "Mommy" YAAAKKK ! Anuba ! E di sana "carefree" friend na lang asta ko kagabi. Oh well ! I hope he's okay later on when we get to talk! Nyehehehehehe. Toink ! ANG iNiT ! ! ! ! !!! !!! Ba't ang init sa Pilipinas a? Pyuuuw! ( >_<) |
|
SCHeDule na kay sablay ( >_ POSTED AT 03:45 PM (IND 3) Industrial Design 3 [Rm 602] : 8am-12pm (PHL 5) Logic 5 [Rm 408] : 1pm-4pm TUESDAY (MP 1) Materials & Process 1 [Rm 403] : 8am-10am (LIT 101) Intro to Literary Types [Rm 403] : 10am-1pm (FBC2) Football [Football Field] : 3pm-5pm WEDNESDAY (IND 3) Industrial Design 3 [Rm 602] : 8am-12pm THURSDAY (PHYS 102) Physics [Rm 603] : 8am-11am (MATH 102) Plane Trigonometry [Rm [Rm 603] : 11am-2pm (MATH 204) Descriptive Geometry [Rm 402] : 5pm-8pm FRIDAY (TECH 1) Techniques 1 [Rm 602] : 8am-12pm (MC 1) Model Construction 1 [Rm 102] : 1pm-5pm CWTS : NSTP Comment: Isang malaking GOODLUCK sa akin. At sa amin. Grabeh. - Shyet! May LOGIC kami! WAHAHAHAHA! Wala ako non e. Pano yan? - Physics! NAKOW e bumabagsak ako sa subject na yan nung 4th year e! Pano na yan? - 2 MATH? Anubayan! - Thursday schedule. Wow, wala akong masabi. Tulugan na ito! Joke.. - Football! Wheeeeee ! Halos lahat ng IND 2-2 nandito! Yahuu! Sina Mico, Joey, Rap, Lahat! Yahuuuuu ! (^_^) - Sana wala kaming Technical Drawing HAHAHAHA NAKO baka sa Techniques meron. Patay tayo jan bata ! (^_^)! |
|
June 3rd, 2005
Balik sa dati nanaman.. Ano to buhay YoYo ? POSTED AT 11:54 PM Haaaaaaay. Isa lang ba itong gaguhan session? Dala ng mga gawain kong biglang tumbas sa kamalasan? Yes I'm thinking, thinking, thinking. It's nobody's fault. But I feel sad all of a sudden. Something came up. And I'm in dire need of sleep. But here, I'm having fun just so I can NOT think of "him". I'm having this voice conference with Derrick and Keet. But Derrick was still fixing his mic and so I and Keet are conversing with words and not through typing. We type once in a while! Hehehehe! So Fun! But still I can't get all happy.. Sorry.. I wish everything would go back to how it was before. Or also, make me have a pause in my ubber stupid lifestyle. Sigh* I hate it. |
|
June 4th, 2005
...and I hope you're feeling okay. POSTED AT 05:18 PM I wonder if I'd get to connect to the Internet soon afterwards? Will I have Voice Conference again with boss Keet and Derrick and Jen? Hahaha new found friends. It's errie but nice when you get to know people online. Oooooohhhh.. And also, I wonder how he's doing... Maybe he's got family problems again and his head's all jumbled up again, thus, can't seem to know what step to take or what to do. Awww.... ( T_T) Oh I hope he recovers. I'll just pray for him then. Sigh* la la la la la la la la........ |
|
June 6th, 2005
3:17AM ng isulat ko ito. POSTED AT 03:29 AM My head was filled with A LOT of thoughts..... Ranging from cellphones to people to band practice to memories to imaginative thinking to all sorts of dillusional agendas. But usually I get to sleep afterwards. It's so odd coz I can't seem to snooze. It's raining. It's the rainy season all right. I got my sister's phone and was computing for the possible expenses I might spend when I would get out on Tuesday. Money matters, and it friggin sucks. Money.. Sometimes I just wonder how rich people handle situations such as this. Hey wait a minute! The rich don't commute! They have drivers! Heller.... Tanga naman len o. E talagang iba na talaga iyon! Hahahaha ! And bad luck seems to come around other people. If only I could be the one to stay by their side and just hug them tight, just so they could feel that they're not alone and that I love them. That I love him.... I want to love everybody! I want to love my family first coz I get all pissed at times. Then I'd like to help out my friends. Even though I have to rest and all, when they need something, I want to help out until I get all tired. What a saintly thing. YAK! Wala lang. Parang... Gusto ko na, instead na magmahal ako para sa sarili kong kapakanan, e di magmamahal na lang ako para sa kapakanan ng iba. Hindi ba mas okay yun? Nakana talagang kelangan ko ng matulog. Haaay. I love you,....... Nyahahaha.... Sablay! Charengan na itu. Toink. I just like to say that. Hmhmhmhmhmhmhmhm . . . . . .... . . ... .. . . ( -_-)zzZ |
|
All mixed up. POSTED AT 01:41 PM I shouldn't be sad that someone's happy with his/her life. But why do I think otherwise? Sigh* He/she is happy.... Sigh* I guess I just miss feeling the way he/she is experiencing. I guess, deep down, I want to feel that certain sensation or experience he/she is in to. I want a different lifestyle for a friggin change. Sigh* Oh, I don't want to ever think about it right now. I'm going to keep myself busy. NOW. So it's fixing school supplies and stuffies for me! Darn....... Get away, thoughts. Get away! Shoo! Nuba! Hahaha! Currently listening to: my peyb band, joke. Currently feeling: mixed up |
|
June 8th, 2005
Sea Ocean. POSTED AT 12:08 AM Now how about crying? Is it a therapy too? ( ~_^) Today I did nothing but cry. Actually, the reasons behind it are quite interesting, I daresay. 1) I was watching movies like The Joyluck Club. Made me cry. Womanhood can be such a drag. Sigh* Kidding. Nice movie. 2) Watching Music Videos and sight-seeing on cheesy love songs and, yeah, I cried. Whupi! ( >_<) Pati ba naman sa "The Day You Said Goodnight" ng Hale. LECHE! NAIYAK AKO! PODA. Ang ganda kasi nung video. Yung video ako naiiyak. Pero kung yung Live ang pinakinggan ko, wala na. Ayoko na. Hehehehe. And other cheesy but nice OPM videos and other not so OPM.. 3) When I slept, I was supposed to listen to The Used or Armor for Sleep. But I accidentally but surely got into the farthest track, thus hearing Saosin. (T_T) I felt like I wanted to cry again. (T_T) Seven Years is such a classic song to me. Forever. And all the other songs. Each and everytime I would have the chance to hear their songs, it would get more .. Personal. Sigh* Lately I've been questioning Anthony Green's sex. He's Gay! Hahaha. And I was thinking, the reason why he left the band coz he was having an secret affair with guitarist, Justin. HOHOHOHO! Yaoi na itu! Aww I miss yaoi. JOKE LANG! Hala! Hala! Masama yan Elena!! (^_^) And now I'm typing this offline while I wait for the clock to strike 12.. FREE INTERNET! Only 1 hour remaining. Hmmmm. But you know... There's always a deep and very personal and emotional reason why a person cries. Someone doesn't just CRY unless he/she were an actor in a movie. But when instances come and you just, cry, that's serious! But I make it as a joke. So that everyone would think I'm still in normal state. "Shush." ( -_-) |
|
ang hirap talaga maging babae.. (T_T) POSTED AT 09:40 PM It's more on my night outs and gimiks. I REALLY have a diffuclt time asking permission from my parents because, FIRST AND FORMOST: Not enough money. They're budgeting so much, they have to save. And so, thus, affecting my other not so useful expenses like my goin out. So shitty! NOt because I hate them. No I dearly love them. I'm just upset at the world, why does it have to evolve on money? Well okay I blame them also. Sigh* Why do I have to be so middle class? Sorry for the ubrupt insult. I know it's SO bad. And then another factor comes in. SAFETY. BECAUSE I'M A GIRL and, they say, stupid drunkards and rapists might take advantage of me. WHY ARE THERE PEOPLE WHO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF WOMEN? CAN'T THEY JUST.. Have sex with themselves or something? WHY ARE GIRLS SUCH A TOOL FOR MEN'S AROUSAL AND INTIMATE PLEASURE? Sometimes I really hate that friggin fact when men lose control of what they WANT IN LIFE. And it pisses me off. So anyway I'm going off topic.. Pardon.. Safety. Mom says someone should bring me home. BlaBlaBla. But if that person brings me home, it's too costly for the guy. But then WHAAAA. (>_<) I can't think of any more factors. I'm just SO in a rut right now. Like my hopes have faded. I had to lie to my parents just so I could come. A Life's End Point is part of my life now and playing the drums is part of my expression so that I can prove to people I'm something. And so that might be the true reason why I have to put up with all the "hassles of the world". I mean, all the trouble. I had to lie. I have to get a calculator and compute for the expenses. I have to do this, do that. Why.. Is this happening to me? I HAVE TO GO THIS SATURDAY! I HAVE TO COME UP WITH THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF MONEY COZ I HAVE TO BE FRIGGIN THERE! (T_T)I'm so much in trouble. I am so much in trouble. Sigh* I AM so much in the verge of getting MORE pissed.. AT EVRYTHING! NAiiNiS AKO! PU... YaYaYaYaYa ! ! Hoohoohoohoo sniff sniff:: (T_T) i> Currently listening to: the noise of silence Currently feeling: PiSSED!!!! Pu!! Hay nako! |
|
June 9th, 2005
My F***ing TEETH HuRTS! (T_T) POSTED AT 07:34 PM TOOOOOOT :::: INA! Kung alam nyo lang kung gano kasakim. OO KASAKIM ANG pagkaSAKIT NG NGIPIN KO. Kasi.. May patubo nanamang Wisdom Tooth sa right side sa dulo ng gums ko. AND IT FRIGGIN HOITS! I mean. HURTS! ANG SAKIT TALAGA!!!!!! (T_T) (uy parang nawalala na yung sakit.. steg.) P.S. Ngayon parang nagkaka Hikaps naman ako. Hwow. Gureyt. *Hicup!* (T_T) Currently feeling: aray! |
|
June 12th, 2005
I feel sick. But feeling FINE! Yahuu! (^_^) POSTED AT 02:01 PM Euck...... (cough.. cough*) Sniff sniff.. It was fun, as usual. We, ALeP were very nervous yet eager to play. When we got there, I was in a complete shock coz there was only a Hi-Hat and Ride. E puta naman.. Nataranta lang ako for 3 minutes. "Kaya ba?" Mico asked me. "Kaya mo ba kahit walang cymbals?" and I was just sitting there staring at him, so clueless. But then I just told myself "Hokay sige. Gawin na natin to." For a moment, a praticular thought ran through my head like a lightning bolt of somesort. Gave me a slight inject to boost up my frustrated confidence. ...And "they" said it turned out "Good"...... Good is nice.. I think. And I need a LOT more practice. Thank you. Gee, I feel so heavy. Anyway THANK god for Isobel, Cara, Dav, Gino and Uncle Bob (idol..) for coming. I never expected that you guys were gonna come. And it means the world to me. Naks. Can't imagine Freedom Bar night without a touch of simple 'ol family friends sharing the same Kagaguhan and Kalokohan at Kamanyakan. NYOHOHOHHO. Though I had some friends who weren't able to come. Like Keet. Awww I missed you guys.. Hopefully you COULD come next time. And that is if we'd play again soon. Just have to make way for study, that sort of crap. Kidding.. Sayang din.. Forfeit the Trial wasn't able to play as well. Aww I missed them. It would have been 10X happier when those certified true Buskonians were there. Shempre Brad Band. Ernest! Ano.. Hindi ako naka order ng PlaneDividesTheSky small/extra small na shirt kasi CD lang nabenta nila. Hoho! Galeng nga pala nila. Hanep da muuvs opda boks. Yahu.. Speaking of bands, parang gusto kong magkwento e. Yung unang banda bago kami, taga Benilde raw sila. Kilala ko na sila coz I saw them play in Katips. Napahiya lang ako sa drummer nila nung naghiram ako ng Crash. Di ko makakalimutan yon. Sabi nya, "Uhh, hindi pwede e.." nung nag request ako ng Crash. Ayoko pa naman na tinu-turn down kaya't bigla akong na emotional disorder for 3 mins. Anyway tapos na yun. Bibili na lang ako ng crash. Salamat. Pangatlo pagkatapos namin. DITCH. Hwow. Mali ang inakala ko sa banda na ito. They had nifty emo compos that made me nod my head back and forth, up and down. They were good! Pang-apat, Dicta License. Nyahahaha puta ndi ko sila nakilala. Lalo na yung boks kasi ang ikli na ng buhok nya. And they were Guuuuuud. It's too bad that I forgot the title of the songs they played. But more or less, they were mostly in tagalog speaking about factors affecting our country. I was shouting "MAHAL KO ANG PILIPINAS" right after their song, and good thing they laughed at me. Dapat lang, kundi.. Kidding.. Sino ba yung panglima? I can't remember.. Oh yes. I think it was already 13needles. OYE! Inaabangan abangan ko talaga yang bandang yan kahit mejo duda pa ako sa music nila. Nakakatuwa lang sila. Ang dami kasi nila e. "Uwo-OOHH!" Hehehe. Steg.. Go Bamboo Antonio raw. Nyehehehe. Aprub.. Then after them it was this Nerd Punky band that I stongly like as well kasi sobrang gusto ko ng tumayo at sumayaw talaga non nung tumugtog sila. Nagbabakasakali lang ako baka alisin na ako sa banda kung ginawa ko yon. Hehehehe kidding. Anyway ang galeng! Iniisip ko agad na puro old skul punk ang mga influences nila. Gud. Gud.. PAGKATAPOS. PleynDibaydsDaIskay na!! Personally I haven't seen them play yet. E tangina nung tumugtog sila, I was like "E teka, kaharap ko lang tong mga to a! Whoa can't believe it.." Ang galeng galeng sumayaw e. Kaya hindi na ako sumayaw kasi magiging panira lang ako sa eksena. Galeng. I was looking forward to watch Chicosci engkaso uwi na raw kami sabi nina Isobel. Tito Glenn and Tita Choie were already waiting semi-patiently for us. Humihirit pa ako na mamaya na lang pero, kelangan na. So I said my Goodbye's to my beloved bandmates (ismak sa chik! Except si mico, bastos! Hehehe kidding. Peace tayo!) And I went home groggy and utterly wasted. Aww nabitin ang aking mga Funcy sisters and braders. Hayaan nyo may araw din tayo na tuluyang magiging malaya. Yez. PICTURES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please send them Isobel A.S.A.P? And so many thank you's to you and to you! Hala! Bwahahaha! Laseng pa ata ako e. Hehehehehehe. You should see the pictures. And the Band Pics. And the groggy pics. And teh censored pics. NAH! No censorship, just plain "babuy-ness" all over. A night to remember.. A therapeutic night with something still missing. P.S. HAHAHA! "I love you" ng "I love you" ako madalas. Laseng na ako e. Tapos e buti na lang mababait mga kaibigan ko. Naki join na rin sila sa aking "I Love You" spree. SAYA KAYA! Sisigaw mo lang na "I Love you" sa himla! Sa ambiance na kay ganda! Whoooo! "AY LAB YUU! WHOOO! MAHAL KO ANG PILIPINAS!! GUSTO KO NG SUMAYAW!!" (^_~) I feel better now. Sana.. Currently listening to: the sweet voice of Anthony Green |
|
June 22nd, 2005
Burado. Barado. POSTED AT 09:19 PM Pero hindi ko na ikukwento. Basta ang gusto ko lang i-share dito.. Ay nagmukha nanaman akong tanga talaga. Dugyot na ko kanina sa sobrang init. Lukot na blouse ko at sweaty na. Hindi ako mapakaling isipin na "Kaya pala. Kaya pala.." Pero masaya. I would find a way without you... Make the same mistake twice. Flash of red and green all over me... It was a mere Error and was NOT done on purpose. Thank you. ( -_-) I love my new friends. Yahuu ! Touched? ( ^_^) Currently listening to: Say-Ocean w/ akustiks |
|